How College Prepares You for the Real World in Unimaginable Ways ...

College teaches you a lot of valuable lessons. Surviving in the real world is not one of them. At least, I don't think most colleges and universities mean to teach their students about the real world. The innovative students sort of end up teaching themselves. I think we should ask for a portion of our tuition in return, but that's just me. Tell me truly, though, how many of these lessons did you learn?

1. You Learn to Survive on Ramen and Slim Jims

(Your reaction) Thank you!

College (probably) taught you nothing about budgeting, but you know how to feed yourself after you fail to budget.

2. In Fact, You Can Take Care of Yourself with No Money

(Your reaction) Thank you!

In college, you got β€œpaid,” what, three times a year? In the real world, sometimes you get paid every two weeks, sometimes, insanely, you get paid once a month, sometimes you get paid weekly. At some point, no matter what, you will blow through all of your paycheck way before you should. In college, you blew that extra aid cash on books, beer, and food. In the real world, it goes to rent, utilities, internet, and your data plan. In both worlds, you're stuck with gourmet ramen and Febrezing the bejeezus out of your clothes for a minute.

3. You Can Survive an All-nighter and Still Look Fabulous

(Your reaction) Thank you!

Okay, as time marches on, that's less because of youthful vigor and more because of excellent concealer, but still. It's a lesson.

4. Plus, You Know How to Nap on the DL

(Your reaction) Thank you!

No one will ever catch you napping at your desk … but you do it all the time. Your boss is no wiser than your philosophy professor.

5. You Can Get Ready and out the Door in Fifteen Minutes

(Your reaction) Thank you!

Thanks to all-nights and 8 am classes, this is an art form. It is a practical lesson that will serve you well your whole life through.

6. You Know the Cheapest Brands of Booze

(Your reaction) Thank you!

This is helpful to know in your 20s. According to Carrie Bradshaw, you're not responsible for buying the drinks until you're in your 40s, so it's still safe enough to go with the cheap stuff.

7. You Will Win Every Costume Party You Attend as an Adult

(Your reaction) Thank you!

This is due to the sheer amount of themed parties you attended in college. You will never be at a loss for a costume and it will always be clever.

8. You Know How to BS Anything

(Your reaction) Thank you!

Literally anything. Give you five minutes and access to Google, and you will always wow everyone listening to whatever you're supposed to be talking about. You'll forget your marvelous idea five minutes later, but whatever.

9. Especially in Writing

(Your reaction) Thank you!

You'll look back fondly on all the paper writing you did in college. Those papers gave you the ability to ramble your way through any email, resume, or cover letter.

10. You Know What It's like to Be Drowning in Debt

(Your reaction) Thank you!

Some people don't get to know how that feels until they're middle-aged. You know at 18! You're so advanced!

11. You Know How to Carry a Lazy Colleague

(Your reaction) Thank you!

Why? Because of frigging group projects, that's why. Well … unless you were the lazy team member, I guess.

12. You Know How to Follow Attendance Policies

(Your reaction) Thank you!

You know, so your grade doesn't get docked. Or your pay. Whatever. The point is, you know how to perfectly toe the line. It's a shame no boss will ever say to you, β€œYour attendance does not affect your paycheck.”

13. You Learn How to Scrape by

(Your reaction) Thank you!

Not the greatest lesson, but a true one nonetheless. When you have to, you do know how to scrape by doing the least amount possible. Sad to say, this will come in handy at some point in your real world future.

14. You Know What It's like to Be Excited about Your First Day at a New Job …

(Your reaction) Thank you!

It's exactly how you felt before your first day of college! Something new! So exciting! Gonna learn so much! Gonna make new friends! Gonna have the time of your life!

15. ...only to Find That Reality Does Not Match Expectation

(Your reaction) Thank you!

Nope. It never does. It never, ever does.

16. You Know How to Suck up

(Your reaction) Thank you!

Just like you once made β€œfriends” with the snarkiest professor on campus, you know you can make your boss adore you. Surely, you'll be promoted to VIP within your first six months.

17. You Can Daydream about Your Life Choices for Hours

(Your reaction) Thank you!

This is a hobby that will continue in the real world. Welcome to adulthood!

Did you learn any unexpectedly practical lessons in college?

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